Breathing Inanimate

Like a scented lotion lathered on my skin,

Absorbed, inhaled and taken in.

Refuse to spit out,

Caressed and dissolving beneath you.

With your eyes closed.

I'll be the one to stare.

Trace my fingers around your lips.

Wake with a kiss.

Will there ever be a time,

Where you link a chain?

Link our hearts, combine.

I am nothing else but the stone by your side.

Shell

I really lost my heart.
And this time I can't find it.
I call for it,
I look for it.
It is nowhere.
All that leads me, is my mind.
All I hear is my mind,
So I listen.

It could be up to me to change.
But instead, I sit here waiting..
Because it always feels like there is something that is going to happen.
Something, an awakening, anything.
Nothing ever happens. And the waiting will not. ever. stop.
Right?

So do I force myself up out the door and try to find sanity
within the crowds and routine lived by others?
Creating the same thing for myself...?

I am looking for my heart,
because I have blocked off everything I can feel.

And I can't feel.
So, I don't know
What I care about.

I try to dig that knife into my skin,
Into my wrists.
Just so that I can feel SOMETHING.

And I wake up to examine the marks I left.
I need to know that I am real. I need to feel it.
But instead.
I am just dead.
I am just...empty.

Just a shell.

Stop

When you start to believe in nothing,
When you start to say good bye
When you start missing
When you start crying,
and give up trying.
When this feeling never stops,
and almost everything feels as if it isn't real and happening.

The world is spinning,
while your watching.

And you are left to save yourself,
But you don't know
where to start
where to end..

If there were a button that said "stop"
Who would hesitate to push it?