Stolen in Months of May

My heart chokes on itself,
I spit blood.

Coughing out the poison I swallowed in your kiss.
I am infected, infested, addicted.
I need your hands in mine.

Lay here with me forever,
We don't need to make a sound.

Lay. Existing only in this darkness.

Sweep the pain away.
You touch my skin, you remove me.
Completely.

Out of my encased shell, holding my soul.
I'll slip into your chest now.

And I'm not like the others,
No I landed here, a fallen comet.
From above, steal me.
Quiet. Our lips magnetic.

All I asked for are countless more moments,
As soft as our colliding skin.

I beg for more days.
I scream for you.

I will wait an eternity.
If time is needed to heal your wounds.

I'll be here, when they close.
Heal. Quench.

Breathe. Again.

Restless For the Waiters

Everyday you sit
At your desk.

Check this page.

Invade this parade.

Because maybe if we could join each other.
No one would know what it feels like to be alone...

Sometimes I am willing to give that up.
But it's the only thing I have that is permanent.

Isolated in this seclusion,

No one can make this half a whole.

Forgive, don't forget.

It wasn't you who upset me. You really want to know what I'm upset about? I can't remember the last time I was happy. The last time I was happy, I was living life and loving it, learning and realizing myself the way I never had before. I wasn't ready for a relationship but I agreed to put myself in that position when I answered "yes." to establishing one with you. I had just found my happiness and soon after that, misery stole  me back. You took away my fucking happiness. I'm not okay with myself when I look back and realize that happiness could have lasted longer. I ignored my instincts, the warning signs by trying to believe I'd be missing out on a great opportunity if I didn't take it. But it ended. I wasn't what you wanted. I gave it my best. It wasn't enough for you. And now I have to start all over again. You wasted my time, and I let you. I was consistently waiting for you, always let down and disappointed. But I was still the one who was willing to fight. You just let me go like it was nothing, like it was so easy. Do you feel pain?

You cut me out of your life and now I'm here again. And it isn't fair. I don't deserve this. You definitely never deserved me. I understand that. It's unfortunate I am even experiencing these feelings when you have already been seen prancing around other girls...Did I really mean nothing to you, at all? Am I really that worthless?

The answer is no, I'm not. You had no right to let me feel that way. No right..At all. Who do you think you are? That is something I'll never know. You deserve the misery in your life, and not having time for anyone. You don't deserve anything. I would never say such a thing. About anyone. But I realized I hate you. I try not to, but I do. And I will not apologize for it. You will never find someone like me. You lost your grip and I'm glad you let go. Because I notice so much more. And I bet you don't notice a thing at all. You once told me you were heartless... I should have believed you.