Shell

I really lost my heart.
And this time I can't find it.
I call for it,
I look for it.
It is nowhere.
All that leads me, is my mind.
All I hear is my mind,
So I listen.

It could be up to me to change.
But instead, I sit here waiting..
Because it always feels like there is something that is going to happen.
Something, an awakening, anything.
Nothing ever happens. And the waiting will not. ever. stop.
Right?

So do I force myself up out the door and try to find sanity
within the crowds and routine lived by others?
Creating the same thing for myself...?

I am looking for my heart,
because I have blocked off everything I can feel.

And I can't feel.
So, I don't know
What I care about.

I try to dig that knife into my skin,
Into my wrists.
Just so that I can feel SOMETHING.

And I wake up to examine the marks I left.
I need to know that I am real. I need to feel it.
But instead.
I am just dead.
I am just...empty.

Just a shell.

After the Rain

And every time you look past the dark,
There will be a glitter in the air.

And every time you remember how to smile,
There will be eyes that are cleared.

And every time you hold your breath,
Just look before you drown.

'Cause you can change your life at any moment.
You can turn it all around.

Don't give up, just because you feel pain,
Remember it will leave, it will fade away.

Fight for your dreams, and cut away your fears.
So where will you go once the rain disappears?

Soul Search

And every cut you scar me with,
Just numbs me to the core.

Everything like shattered glass, I've felt it all before.
And if you try to take my hand,
Just watch for it to break.

'Cause everything you steal from me,
I can't continue to replace.

I'll stay lost behind these walls,
You won't see me if I fall.

The time keeps moving, Im feeling small.

Try to take me away.
Try and steal, but i'm afraid.
You have no words left to say.

You can't take what you break.
You can't take what you took.

Like a heart
continues to beat.
Like the soul in my body, two things that continue to meet.

And if I could disappear,
I would want to be some place so far away from here.
So far away from here.

Don't try to look in my eyes.
Don't try to wipe back my tears.

This isn't your place.
You got no right to leave me,
With fear.

So what did you do to me?
Why did you leave me here?