The Envy of Time

Please step away
From the shriveling cold
You know you're more
Than what you've settled for
Quietly moving
Because you don't know
When to slow down

I just needed to be held
Escape the world
Inside my head

And breathing
Only turns to fog
So please step away
From the shriveling cold
Kissed my lips
The wish I sold

Morning Hues

I've heard you've lost
Your head in the clouds.

I heard you cannot speak
Out loud.

I heard you fell
From outer space.

I heard the Earth
Quiver and shake.

But if I were sent
To the edge of this world
I'd just dive off
And never swim back..

The Breathing Space

I awaited to take off in the rocket I built,
The moment I hit the release button
It broke down.

Dreams of ascending to the sky
I will find a way to fly.

Out of red moon poisoned light,
The only security is dark, bitter night.

Where people talk in sleep,
Their voices escape to stars.

Shallow becoming deep,
The only movement from destructive cars.

All repressive desires release in subconscious haze,
Everything expires in rotted extended days.

And patience has lost it's value, all that is left is rage.
Anger brought to brew, dagger to rib cage.

And all the black has taken my vision.
And all the songs have caused indecision.

Each and every rocket to sit in a solid place,
Only waiting for the launch, to reach into outer space.

Curse of the Sky

All this rain,
For all this love
You refuse to give away.

A permanent rain cloud,
Inescapably pending.

There's a thunder waiting beneath the surface.

Ignorance is not an option.

A warning sign heard from miles away.
Will break the strings you made today.

Innocence - getting further away.

Colliders

The lonely hallway waits,
The two loves exchange embrace.

Upon a trail of sparkled stars,
A distance which we once called ours,
And so it's gone away.

A hello that unravelled,
Into hopeless romance and glittering eyes,
We dreamt of a land becoming our own escape.

And no one else can reach us in our sand castled towns,
These streets are ours to sweep.

Each grain marks the defeat,
of the heart I long to keep.

Starting Line

Nothing is wrong.
Nothing is here.
Nothing is okay.

Nothing is wrong.
There is just a constant battle,
A constant war with myself.

It's exhausting.

It makes everything seem so much more than what it will ever be.
Or really, what it actually is.

I hurt too much when people leave.
I think too much to try and sleep.

I give up trying when coping with myself is unbearable.

I dont seek help because I dont want it.

I want the ability to do things on my own.
Even though I seem unable to.

I need help, I need an escape.
I need to be guided.
Loved.
Cherished.
Recognized.
Inspired.

But I just sit here, watching
My life pass me by.

Because Ive lost the starting line.

Self-Murder

What is in my head is hurting, is aching.
You don't know what they do to me.
And you just hope for me to stay submerged.

In this ocean, of fear, darkness, and insomnia.

"Kill. Yourself. Death. Die. Dying."
They whisper.

And I have no way to escape.
I once assumed death is my way out.
Of this trap I am consumed by.

If I could find the way to break free
I will never be coming back here.