Shambles

Without a purpose,
What do you do?

What have you done?

Every choice is too minor.
So I've refused to choose one.

Wisely, now and don't fear being afraid.
Afraid causing walls and cautions, betrayed.

Roaming the earth,
Like a clock wasting time.

Searching every corner, every depth of my mind.

Fast forward, rewind.
Still can't find.

I feel something is missing at all times,
It's the purpose that's lost and playing behind.

Not enough questions, and answers develop more.
What is it now?
What are we waiting for.

Lectures from Fathers

You live in a room with one door.
Did you know there are galaxies, skies and conspiracies?

Built a path and caged us in,
Like you're on gate patrol .

This is isn't the way it goes,
We've taken our own roads.

You've looked down for too long,
Now all you see is the ground.

And I don't climb into your arms anymore,
Because it hurts to face your cage.

I don't belong where I choose to break free.
Maybe you should try new beliefs.

Life is filled with a million crossroads,
Several you have walked your own.

But still you fail to believe,
They're right.

We're all wrong, right?
Issues and mistakes are worse than devils, right?

But we're the ones that need to wake up.
Apparently.

You need to dig your way out,
Soon we'll be gone.

The Reasons We Wonder

It's crazy right,
That you're on the other side of the country,
And I still care?

Crazy,
how feelings can continue to develop,
Even if your just conversing through technology.

When this happens I want to stop speaking to you,
Texting you, messaging you.

Because you're not here physically,
And what is the point of these screens?

I may as well shut everything off,
And pretend you don't exist.

But even if there is a month of a gap of silence,
You never fail to ask me how I'm doing,
And tell me you miss speaking to me.

I'm sorry but i'd rather be empty and lonely,
Then loving and terrified.

I have a guard I can't hide.
And I can't give anyone mine.

I'll say I miss you,
I felt it the first time you departed.
And I've questioned why ever since.

But I don't know how to do this,
Therefore, I can't.

Therefore, I'll just miss you.
It's better than having it all.

With Helium

I made my wishes,
And sent them off into the sky.

The wishes are landing.

I tell fear to leave me alone,
Because I cannot be afraid.

Not this time.
This time
I have to hold onto the wishes
And ascend to the sky with them.

Because you can't let go
Of the thoughts that make your heart beat,
The thoughts that keep you up at night.

The thoughts that drive you to believing.

I'll chain my arm if I have to.

I just know i'm airbound.
Sooner than later.

There's no where else I'd rather be.

Oceania

I believe in forgetting.
I believe in the buried.

I believe in those.

It's okay to hide, it's okay.

Secrets that are yours to hold.
And someday you'll understand why.

Just don't push the guardians too far away.

Keep them there, at a distance.
Someday you might need one of them.
And that's okay too.

Hold on to your journals as well.
It's okay if you only want to hold a pen your entire life.
Instead of a hand.

It's okay. If you don't need a friend.

It's okay to be alone.

Just don't forget to understand all of this.
And most of all.
Don't forget to love yourself at any point in time.

It'll come. It'll struggle, and then like a wave...
It will collapse and get swallowed back in as soon as it touches the shore.

Hours

I know where I need to be,
I just haven't found a way to get there.
But I trust in the universe,
So I trust that somehow it'll come.

Like a comet circling the Earth,
I am held in the idea of the surrounding of mountains.

I could stand, solidly.
I could stare, endlessly.

I am finding my entire self, in me.
Through what's broken in me.

And I can't regret a single thing.
I am everything with every thing.
Done, gone and bound to happen.

I have the power to change lives,
Just like you had the power to destroy mine.

But now, i'll fly.
I don't choose to ever land again.

Parallel Universe

Now on this planet,
We are not who we were.
Not who you are.
Sea is not yours.
You are not this.

In that galaxy, you are.
In this one, you could be.

Like a mirror.
Two sides.

Two places.
One time.

I am by the writer.
Nor the walker.

The reader now.
The observer, here.

What doesn't feel real. It's not.
It's two.

Two being one.

Speaking through technology,
There its only personally.

Airbound

The plane waits behind the shield.
And you wait half way.
And we wait to press play.

If only I could pull the magic from the sky to save us from the gap that separates us.

I don't need a distance or a barrier.

Let's exchange,
Hearts.

Let's share,
Souls.

Like a ton of bricks have fallen, there are signs following me everywhere.

In My Head

If I could be in your arms, I would be.
If I could be on your side of the country, that's what I'd choose.

For all the voices I've tried to ignore,
The feelings tell me that I can't.

And this is where it's hard to be human.

Detach from what's beating, just keep breathing.

Suppressing Lives

You asked me
If I ever think of the spirits in my past.
If I wonder of their lives, who they are, what's been missed.

But when someone is gone, I am capable of swallowing them whole.
Every memory, every word.

If I see you, i'll recognize you and consider you from a dream.

You're not mine,
Just crossing paths in time.

No I don't rewind.

She said, "You literally forgive and forget."

Grainiest of Greens

A lie to have your own.
A lie just broke a trust.

Everything holding significance
Cut off with your own carelessness.

But you still smile and and run oblivious,
To all the things that matter.

Did you know that even the trees could breathe?
Did you know,
I think you've lost me.

A Reoccurring Black Figure

You can't keep chasing me
Through dreams.

It's not where I am awake.
But I still run.

It's too dark in there.
I only see tunnels.

And I don't remember if I ever escape,
Or if I continue to trace laps into circles.

Facing The Wall

Confined and picked a part,
question after question.

I sleep to a dream
With a messenger,
You can't tell me who I am.

All the things I faced,
Cannot break the force I have become.

I'd rather be isolated in liberation,
Than trapped and lost in desperation.

Red

I walked the same way I always do,

And somehow I ran into

Someone that I once knew.

Except it didn't make me smile.

It didn't make conversation.

It was a moment.

And it didn't breathe.

It was a moment.

And I remember the feeling I never want to feel again.

Heartbreak.

Has anyone told you love is a scam?

I drove home and told myself I wanted to die.

The Quiet Distance

I started to make my way over a cliff,

And downpour over the edge.

I thought it was the one thing,

Everyone has always said I didn't do.

As soon as I have broke into water,

There is no landscape for me to flow into.

So I'll flow, anyway.

We Sit In Park

Breaking my skin, can’t get in.

Not deep enough, just not enough.

There is no shallow end, no bottom.

A soul from here to infinity.

Where do you go?

What have you seen.

Impulses start to fire and enrage.

Emotions sparked and left in haze.

I am not looking at the world

The way you do.

Desensitized, destructed, strong and bruised.

I see the truth.

Mutilated

Upheaval. Inside is agony.
Twisting, squeezing.

What is breathing?

Pain like a sword through my heart.

A burst that wells through my entire being.
Eyes can no longer hold back what's crying.

Inside, beside.

I can't identify.
What is hurting?

I wonder if anyone will ever hold my hand.

The Tears I Woke To

I probably needed a place to stay,
But the lasers always catch me
Before I can escape.

The world is always watching,
Every time I've tried to pray.

And god if you were listening,
I'd ask about the night terrors.

But I place in the headphones and absently enter solitude.

A coma not one can understand.

Kony2012

This was a chilling way to end my day. If you don't know who Joseph Kony is, please take some time out of your day to watch this:

http://vimeo.com/m/37119711

STOP KONY. 2012. Let's do this.

Sold

There once was a ceiling
Where your secrets were told,
Where I once lay by your side.

You might have given her the key,
To all you hold inside.

And told her all the things,
You once told me.

Fooled me.

But I'll remember them forever.
Ill remember the lack of heart,
I faced.

And yet, the one who gave her all,
Is the one that's still left alone.

The Zen Room

I may have gone around the world,
I may have caused harm.
I may have caused inspiration.

But I am just the wind.
And you can only feel me.

Reverse, Journey

Alas, I evolved and wondered
How the universe works.

How time works.

You spun me counterclockwise,
I've spun my way back.

Yet your the one who is left with a bouquet.

Not only do I wonder about that,
But where I am.

My fingers shake as I rest,
And I don't feel anything
But the quiet.

Peace. Inside.
I've arrived.
And I don't plan on countering back.

Fourth Dimension

It felt like I was sinking,
Everything went white.

And only rainbows were left,
Hung in the sky.

You can land on a different plane,
Close your eyes, refrain.

Vibrations, frequencies, around.
You felt the world spin.