Friday, July 30, 2010

Floating

I love you more and more
Every time I see you.
I don't know why this is so hard for me.
I feel like you steal my breath away.
With looks you give, with words you say.

It's almost like i'll float away.

Im haunted by hurt from the past,
Even though it didn't last.
It comes back to haunt me
and then im left with fear.

Fear takes my wings away,
and all of a sudden nothing is okay.

You make my heart beat faster,
you tangle me in thoughts of ever after.
You take my hand, and hold it there,
and I feel again.

You make me feel alive,
It's almost as if a light has gone off
inside of me.

And it glows endlessly,
with all the love your giving me.

I have refused to believe in anything,
because my heart was broken.

How can I not believe in anything,
when I have received someone like you.

I thought wishes didn't come true.

But now I know, I love you.

Monday, July 26, 2010

my love

Changing,
growing.
This is what life is about.
Gaining experience.
Learning, loving.
Trying, failing, losing.

Getting back up,
breaking.

You are the one I should tell all my secrets too.
So here it goes, here you are.

They are things I have hidden,
Because I have been afraid.

Afraid of myself,
Afraid of what you would think, do or say.

Afraid of being close
So, I get further,
from everyone and everything.

But im learning
how to be apart
How to be a link included in a chain.

We are all connected.
We are all loved.

Ask for help when you realize
you can't do it on your own.

There are others willing,
helping hands.
When all you have to do is reach out for one
You pull away instead.
Running
From everyone
So they don't see the battle you are fighting
inside.

You will see my battles, you will see my scars,
You will hear it all and have it all.
Because you have my love.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Tangled

When I fell in love for the first time,
It felt real, I felt pain, I felt alive.

You love me.
And yes, I say it back.

But this is the reason for why I am uncertain.
I can't feel anything.
Nothing feels as strong or as sharp as it once did.

I can't hurt you.
I can't lose you.
Because your probably the closest thing I have to perfect.
Even if it's unfair.
At least I tell you.
You still won't leave me,
Because you think that I just need time.
And your waiting...

Your the closest thing I have to perfect
So why do I push you away?
Why do you not let my harsh words hurt you?

Open me up
Taste my blood
And take everything

Because sometimes I think I have nothing left,
But maybe if you can steal everything away from me
Than maybe, just maybe
I will begin to feel
Again.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Me and The World

I just dont know
what I want anymore
I just want to run away
because its an easy way to escape
I just want to give up
because im tired of trying
but ive wanted to give up so many times
I cant find the quitter in me
no matter how hard I want to stop.
I just dont know anything,
as soon as I knew everything.
I'm frustrated
I'm irritated
I feel shut out
Left out
Alone
I wish it could just be me and the world
because that would be enough.

Monday, July 5, 2010

finished

What am I so frustrated about?
Why can't I figure myself out.
I'm starting to not want anyone around,
Because I am so raged.

Watch out.
Move please.

I dont know what the fuck is wrong.
Im just going to keep hurting everyone around me
Until it hurts me.

Because right now I dont give a shit about anything
I dont know why

I dont know what caused this

But im done caring.


Why am I with you, when all I want is to be alone.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

anniversary

Tomorrow will be 2 years you left us,
we miss you,
we love you.
I dont know what to do.
I dont know where you are.
There is too much wonder.
I dont know what to look for, anymore.
I search through sky, and clouds and light
but nothing ever comes from it.
Nothing ever comes from anything,
there are only beginnings and endings
and everything in between is forgotten.
So, let's get lost,
or stay lost.
Because I dont know which way is right
or which way is left.
I dont know the way to heaven.
I dont know the way to life.
I just know how to be here losing sanity.
Day after day, is another day I lose my mind.
Im so tired of wasting time.
Im sorry your gone,
but you still exist in my mind.
Love is like feeling too much
that you end up leaving everything behind..

too much

see, I dont mean to be mean.
I dont mean to be this way at all,
but i'm tired.
And I dont know what's wrong.
Im tired of figuring shit out.
I just want life.
And its taking so long to get it.
Im frustrated, angry, sad, confused.
sorry i treated you like shit.
sorry to everyone.
But when i cant handle myself,
I cant handle you either.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

The Great Escape

It's there somewhere. You say you don't see it, it's because you don't want to. It's there somewhere. You say you can't find it, but your looking in all the wrong places. Instead of holding back, take a step forward. And see where you can go, and where you can be. Your standing in a magical endless place, where the sun sets and rises but you choose to sit in the dark and miss it. Miss the magic, miss the air, miss life, miss yourself. Your losing things and dreaming of going backwards because you forget how to go forward. Don't forget about possibilities. Don't forget about yourself. And don't doubt. Because as much as I can see and believe in the universe, I also believe in you. As much as I feel love, I feel you too. Don't give up, dive in and see what you come up with. There is more than you can ever imagine.

the truth about freedom

The space between inhale and exhale the space between stars fill up with air, and collapse into dust I walk a sunlit path and breath...